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  • Writer's pictureBeth Hildebrand

You May Think I’m a Little Crazy | Wait and See Day 7



That’s what it was the first two months of summer.  Every day it showed up unexpectantly although by the second week you’d think I wouldn’t be surprised.  It wasn’t humidity or an afternoon thunderstorm or an ice cream truck .

It was words.

If you’ve been following along with my series this month, you might be seeing why I’ve chosen to write about waiting and seeing.  Simply because those words showed up every day to me this past spring and summer.

You might be thinking I’m a dork to be paying attention to things like words but when they’re blatantly in front of you every day, you can’t help but to notice them.

They were the same words. They had been showing up every so often this past spring but after summer was underway, they splashed me in the face every day.  Shortly after I was aware of this repetitiveness, I read this verse in Ephesians.  It was one of those slap you in the face verses to me.  Partly because it had each of those words in it all in two sentences except for one of the words.“I ask – ask the God of our Master, Jesus Christ, the God of glory – to make you intelligent and discerning in knowing him personally, your eye focused and clear, so that you can see exactly what it is he is calling you to do, grasp the immensity of this glorious way of life he has for Christians oh, the utter extravagance of his work in us who trust him – endless energy, boundless strength!”  (Eph1:17-19 MSG emphasis added)

Did you notice those words underlined?  Yeah. That’s’ them.  Each day, it was always just the right word at just the right time.  They slid right in with DAILY and RANDOM occurrences and things I read that made me feel like it was written as a personal letter to me.  They were words that made me feel restless.  EYES, SEE, CALLING, TRUST, GLORY. UTTER.

(And another word that wasn’t in those verses but appeared the most was WAIT as you may know by now.)

I think God had a good sense of humor in this situation.

It’s as if He said to me though, “Reach to the unseen. (Again.)   Open your eyesSee what I’m calling you (and each one of you) to do.  I have utterly extravagant things I want you to do.  So trust Me.

And here again you might think I’m a little crazy, but the word UTTER caught my attention for some reason.  If you’ve been reading my blog for a while, you might remember how I have a fetish for words that start with RE-.  You know, the prefix RE means anew.

Well, I looked closer at UTTER maybe because the last two letters are ER.  But I like the prefix so much I can notice it backwards too.  OK.  Here’s where you may laugh at me. I looked at the entire word backwards and it’s RETTU.

Remember my new vision?  The one I scribbled down back in February? “Reach to the unseen”?  Well, what are the first letters in each of those words?  REach To The Unseen.  RETTU.

UTTER spelled backwards RETTU.

You might think I’m stretching it a little bit and maybe I am – but seriously.  Isn’t that kind of funny or ironic? I thought so.

So with holy curiosity, I went to the dictionary to find the definition of the word UTTER.  Don’t you sometimes know how to use a word but it’s hard to put it into a definition of your own?


1 [uht-er]  verb

1.  to give audible expression to; speak or pronounce

2. to give forth (cries, notes, etc.) with the voice

3. to express (oneself or itself), especially in words.

I like one of the sentences given as an example of how to use the first definition – “unable to utter her feelings.”

Well that’s how I’ve felt.  Especially the past summer.  Challenged with feelings of amazement and confusion yet rest all at the same time.

And how about these definitions of utter used as an adjective:

1.  complete; total; absolute: her utter abandonment.

2.  unconditional; unqualified: an utter denial.



Sometimes I feel so unqualified.  But deep down I know that I am qualified because God’s Spirit created me to be.  I’ve decided that I am utterly abandoning my desires, my mess, my insecurities and choosing to give forth cries from my heart to open the gates so I can run free. 

And you can too.

Together let’s reach!  Stretch!  Give what we can!  Encourage others to see themselves as God sees them.  He sees YOU as a Masterpiece. He sees YOU as a reflection of Himself.

God utterly amazes me… “the utter extravagance of his work in us who trust him.”

He wants to do extravagant works in you…in me.   We must trust Him. Trust Him. Trust. Him.

May words that make you feel restless or utterly surprised grab your heart and mind.  And trust Him.

 See other Wait and See Series posts here

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